Career or Calling

Many years ago, I found myself sitting in a corner, licking my wounds. I had ridden the real estate bubble up and then emotionally shared its crash. I had been selling over a million a year in landscape and people were waiting weeks just to meet with me. And then suddenly I was trying to figure out how I lost it all in a matter of a few months. It took me a while to figure out that it was just my ego crying.

I had been in the right place at the right time. And yes, I did have the skills needed to capitalize, but I had a lot of help to make it happen. And I also had a lot of help when it all slid out of reach. An entire industry had all but stopped, and that was not in any way something that I controlled. So it was time to do what was in my control. I needed to get up, wipe off the dust and make something good happen.

As it turned out, I liked the thrill of the hunt, chasing the client and signing the deal more than I really liked the design aspect. And my run was long enough to satisfy that mercenary streak in me. The next challenge that I chose was to make my real dream come true. I had wanted to write for as long as I could remember and it was time to take that chance and either make my dream come true or crush it along with a chunk of my heart.

Now a number of years have passed,  and I am still working at that dream. But along the way, I have found what truly lives deep in my heart and what motivates me to keep working toward my dream. I know that it’s not huge royalty checks or fame that are the measuring stick of my success because neither of those is knocking at my door. Instead, I have found satisfaction and a sense of accomplishment in the work that I am doing. It has brought me many wonderful people who encourage and support my work, and who also enjoy reading it. The tool that I use for measuring my success is far less tangible but far more valuable than pieces of paper with numbers or circular pieces of metal. I know that I have found my place at this point in my journey and that this is what I am meant to be doing. I have an inner calm and clarity that is far more important than any commission check I ever cashed.