The definition of suffocation, according to Google’s dictionary feature, is the state or process of dying from being deprived of air or unable to breathe. But what is very surprising to most people is that the intense urge you feel to breath when you are holding your breath, or when you are underwater, is not because your body is starving for oxygen. The instinct to breath is actually caused by carbon dioxide receptors in your lungs. These receptors are encouraging you to exhale and release the toxic gas that is accumulating in your lungs. It is an act of self-preservation at its most basic level.
This realization made me stop and think about another situation when our bodies are asking us to do something, but we often times are misunderstanding the request. Think about the darkest and most depressing moments in your life. Once you finally decided that it was time to find your path out of the darkness, was your first thought focused on what you needed to add to your life to make it better? Now think about the suffocation process again, and apply the same message to being depressed, sad or unhappy.
In many cases, depression, sadness or a dark time in your life is not caused by what is missing; it is caused by the toxic influences and people in your life. Are there people in your life who never offer you a kind word, a compliment or encouragement? When they show up at your door, are they only there to ask you to fix their problems? Are there people you initially felt badly for because they could never seem to catch a break, but then you discovered it was their negative outlook that attracted nothing but bad things? When you see or interact with these people do you feel worn out and almost starved for a single, deep breath of fresh air?
What your body is telling you is that you need to remove these toxic, negative people from your life and not that something is missing from your life. They are ingraining bad habits in your thinking and your outlook on life. It can take as long as 30 days to turn an activity into a habit. So you need a solid month of choosing to see the good in your life. Then you will know that you have created the positive habit of looking for the good instead of just the bad aspects of your life.
Every person needs to truly believe that he or she deserves to be happy. Even accepting that fact can be difficult at times. But once you believe in yourself and your value, then you will understand that your happiness is important. Maybe you have lost your job or just ended a relationship and your self-confidence has taken a huge hit, but you still need to believe that you are a unique and valuable person. And your feelings and happiness are important. Surround yourself with friends and family who are supportive and encouraging, and then focus on believing what they are telling you.
Slowly, you will begin to notice positive moments in your life. Good things will begin to pierce the darkness like tiny rays of sunlight. At first, they might appear to be very simple things like someone smiling at you or making it home just before a huge downpour of rain, but they are good things. And as the month progresses, you will see more and more good things happening in your life and more good people coming into your life as well. Even better, you will no longer suffer from that feeling of suffocation. Instead, you will feel happier and more a peace with yourself.
At times, it can be very difficult to even imagine anything good about your life. But those are the times when it is most critical to seek out the positive and banish the negative aspects of your life. And to know that you are not alone. Many people have fallen into the darkness, but they have managed to find their way out the other side. Reach out to friends or family, read a book of positive quotes, or look for a website, like See The Good, to remind you of all that you have to be thankful for. And then one day, when you come across someone who is in a dark place and feels lost and alone, be that person’s bright ray of sunlight. Offer support and encouragement so that person knows that he or she is not alone and can find the courage to emerge from that dark, difficult time.